Posts Tagged ‘Obama’


Upset With White House Lunch Entrée, Romney Leaves 13% Tip

Thursday, November 29th, 2012

Romney eats crowWashington, DC — Mitt Romney finally got to the White House today, but it was a far cry from the triumphant entrance he dreamed of making prior to the presidential election. Arriving for his lunch with President Obama in a Cadillac SUV, Mr. Romney was greeted not by the president himself or by any senior staffer. Instead the former GOP presidential candidate turned private citizen was welcomed by an intern who was probably not even born by the time Romney made his third hundred million.

Yet Romney acted more stunned than miffed by the strange protocol. “I was prepared to slip whatever senior staffer greeted me a Benjamin. But when this kid shows up, who’s young enough to be my granddaughter, I didn’t know what to do,” he later said. “So I gave her a quarter and patted her on the head.” (more…)

McConnell’s Top Priority: Make Obama A Two-Term President

Thursday, November 8th, 2012
US Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell signals his resolve to make Obama a two-term president.

US Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell signals his resolve to make Obama a two-term president.

Washington, DC—Lest you think that the Republican resolve to obstruct the agenda of President Obama has softened since the American people re-elected him to a second term on Tuesday, one need only take note of the intransigent words spoken by US Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell this morning on the Capitol steps.

“My number one priority is to ensure Mr. Obama is a two-term president,” he declared. And this time, McConnell added, he has the full weight of the US Constitution behind him since it limits the president to two terms. (more…)

Fox News Admits Statements of Idiocy, Not Idiotic Statements

Monday, October 22nd, 2012
Professor Gerund Metcalf, a grammarian from Bob Jones University, explains the critical difference between the phrases “act of terror” and “terrorist act”.

Professor Gerund Metcalf, a grammarian from Bob Jones University, explains the critical difference between the phrases “act of terror” and “terrorist act”.

New York—Chief among Fox News’ denouncements of President Obama’s foreign policy has been his response to the attack on the Libyan consulate, which resulted in the deaths of four Americans, including ambassador Chris Stevens. According to the right-wing cable news network, the president misrepresented the attack on the consulate from day one when, during a Rose Garden speech, he labeled it an “act of terror”.

Appearing on Fox News with Sean Hannity, grammarian Gerund Metcalf of Bob Jones University claimed that calling the attack an “act of terror” is definitely not the same as calling it a “terrorist act,” which, as more evidence comes to light, it seems to have been. “For one thing, the phrase the president used contained the word ‘of’,” Professor Metcalf pointed out, “while ‘terrorist act’ clearly does not.” (more…)